The Human Horse
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The Human Horse

Here goes the hamburger. Every time we’d start to go anywhere he would just act like he want to go with us. So I say to Robert, I said “Robert”, Robert says, “Yeah” I said, “Robert he wants to go. Why don’t we fix the car so he can get in and out. He says, “Ok, a good idea”, so we fix the car and sure enough we take him out to town. He hops in, sits down; he is ready to go.

“Go get us a cheese burger.”

“He goes a little whacky in the car. He is watching the scenery go by.”

“Oh yeah! He is definitely, you know, it is definitely the expression of watching the scenery.”
We would be out riding around in the car and we would get home when we want us a hamburger and when we pull in to get one, well, actually the first thing we thought about was Patches, whether he would want one.


“Hello! May I help you?”

“Let me see what Patches want. What do you want Patches, you want some cheese burgers? Yeah, he wants, okay.”

“Will that be all for you all today?”

“Yes Ma’am. That’ll be all.”

“Please proceed to the window.”



“It is $24.23”

He has had his eyes for the cheese burgers, yeah and no but he don’t care much for coke. He would like to have apple juice. He would love apple juice.

He does like TV, he likes that a lot but he likes the westerns.

“Go get me a beer Patches. Ch-ch-ch-sh-sh. Go get some beer”

Ah, that’s probably a guilty one for that, yeah, I drink, so he will also go to the fridge to get me a beer. He’ll open the fridge, reach out to a beer and bring it to me.

“Yeah, bring it here. Bring it here, bring it here, bring it here, bring it over here, come on! Good Boy! Good boy, thank you Patches! Thank you Patches.”

He answers the phone.

“Hello! It’s for you.”

But he doesn’t actually talk, you can put the phone to his mouth and he moves his lips.

There is no other horse like that. Patches is one, one of a kind.

“Oh, hey there, get there, yeah! Get in, get in, Good Night Patches!”